I have anxiety.

So, I went back to the doctor after we got home from Utah. They diagnosed me with anxiety, and put me on a med to help control the physical symptoms. I'm also taking an anxiety management class. I've found it very helpful, and very enlightening at the same time. I never knew how much of my actions and daily quirks were the result of my anxiety. But I'm feeling much better now that we know the source of my headaches, and stuff. The doctor also told me I have mono again. For the fourth time might I add. Ugh. But this round isn't as bad as the last one, and I'm still able to care for the boys. I just take lots of cat naps.


Lincoln also went to the audiologist recently, and found out that he has a 30% hearing loss, and they think he might have an inner ear disease causing it. He goes for more testing soon, so we hope to get to the bottom of it before too long.

Today, we took Jackson down to his allergist for an oral food challenge. We were going to talk to the allergist about testing peanuts, but she was dead set against it, and so we tested for the peas instead. He failed miserably. We drove 95 miles to walk into a doctor's office, to have him eat one itty bitty pea and break out in hives afterwards. :( The allergist made me give him the EpiPen Jr. in his leg. That was not fun. There is no way that we'll be testing peanuts any time soon. His level was only a 0.43 on his RAST test for peas (blood test to determine the antibodies in his system to the specific allergen), and his level was 1.89 for the peanuts. Negative is considered anything below a 0.35. So his peanuts are almost 5 times higher than the peas. And he still reacted, even after having such a low level. For those that don't know, peas and peanuts come from the same family. They are both legumes. So Jackson has to avoid all legumes because he has an allergy to more than one in that specific family. :( Poor kid. No Easter Egg Hunts, or Trick or Treating, etc. I can't trust others to not give him peanuts. It was just a real bummer to realize that he probably won't outgrow this allergen. It feels like an uphill battle when it comes to the schools, and other people. I can't leave him for playdates, or send him to a friend's house, or even really trust people at Church. I even have a hard time leaving him alone with our family. They are extremely careful, but it's easy for me to make a mistake, let alone someone who doesn't have to deal with it daily. I know everyone has the best intentions. It's just that some people are so uneducated when it comes to food allergies. I mean my kids have little food allergies, but then they also have serious allergies, that include facial swelling. It's just a bummer to realize that Jackson is going to have a hard time at many activites, and stuff until he's old enough to understand, and even then it's going to be hard. I just hate to see my kids struggle, and I know this will be a lifelong thing for him. :(

So currently our food allergies include peanuts, peas, eggs, and corn for Jackson. Trevor is allergic to banana, tomato, and potato.

I guess my kids got lucky and Mommy won't force them to eat their veggies. :)

Oh, and for those wondering, Jackson didn't make it into the school program that we were trying to get him into. He has a mild speech delay, but it wasn't enough for him to qualify. They are going to reevaluate him in October. In the last week or so, he's started stuttering. I hate feeling so helpless when I can't help my children with what they need. :(

Anyway, that's 4 posts. I think I'm off to bed. Can't guarantee when I'll update again, but I'll try before too long.